How to Speak American and British

American and British Flag

Words are the backbone of marketing. The right word at the right time can make or break a sale.

Word choice is extremely important, especially because your website can be viewed by anyone in the world.

So, as a Valentine’s Day present, I’ve written a story in British English (with the non-American words underlined). See how many British terms you’re familiar with!

The translation is below the British version.

Cheers! (Thank You!)

British Flag
British Flag

My Commute

I was on the M25 dual carriageway, just going under the A23 flyover when my silencer flew off, hit the number plate of the articulated lorry behind me, and knocked the bloke’s bonnet up into his windscreen.

The lorry swerved and almost crashed. I watched, horrified, out of my car mirror. We both pulled over right across from the rail station car park and got out.

“What do you think yer doin’?” the bloke said, extremely cheesed off.

“I’m sorry, it’s a hire car. I didn’t know.”

He then said “Belt up! You about killed me, and now I have a massive prang in my wing to fix!”

Whilst still yelling at me, he reached into his boot and pulled out a huge black torch. He came at me screaming “Off with your head!”

At the last second, right before he was to wallop me, a dozen smart chaps in bespoke suits grabbed his arm and wrestled him to the ground.

The biggest one said to me, “Well mate, you decided to cause a crash right in front of a coach full of solicitors. There could be a lot of aggro for you right now.”

But judging by the smell of this ol’ chap, it looks like he’s had one too many rounds at the pub. He has got a drunk in charge coming his way, and we would be obliged to sue him for you.”

And that’s why I’m late, honey.

Translation:

American Flag
American Flag

My Commute

I was on the M25 highway, just going under the A23 overpass when my muffler flew off, hit the license plate of the tractor-trailer behind me, and knocked the guy’s hood up into his windshield.

The tractor trailer swerved and almost crashed. I watched, horrified, out of my rear-view mirror. We both pulled over right across from the train station parking lot and got out.

“What do you think yer doin’?” the guy said, extremely angry.

“I’m sorry, it’s a rental car. I didn’t know.”

He then said “Shut up! You about killed me, and now I have a massive dent in my fender to fix!”

While still yelling at me, he reached into his trunk and pulled out a huge black flashlight. He came at me screaming “Off with your head!”

At the last second, right before he was to wallop me, a dozen well-dressed guys in tailored suits grabbed his arm and wrestled him to the ground.

The biggest one said to me, “Well mate, you decided to cause a crash right in front of a bus full of lawyers. There could be a lot of trouble for you right now.”

But judging by the smell of this ol’ chap, it looks like he’s had one too many drinks at the bar. He has got a DUI coming his way, and we would be obliged to sue him for you.”

And that’s why I’m late, honey.

Is language an important part of your marketing?

Tags: international marketing, marketing language, writing for web

  • Lucas Pequeño

    Sí señor es importante.

  • Karie

    Very clever post! The only important phrase you missed is “Mind the Gap”

  • http://www.webpagefx.com Xander Becket

    Ha! And snogging.

  • Karie

    Bloody right!!!!

  • http://www.cadd-works.com aj

    I enjoyed this. As a H U G E Monty Python fan I was pleased to see a similar video I believe in New Zealand, comics that was very Cleesesque… You tube look for Front Fell Off.

    “right, chop its head off ”
    ” one rabbit stew comin right up “

  • sharne

    bloody right